This week B. Simone caught some flack for calling out women with “lists”. The video, which she posted to her Instagram on Monday, has since racked up 5 Million views and a lot on conversation about unrealistic expectations in relationships. It even drew comparison to an video of singer Fantasia, who echoed her sentiments.
B. Simone’s video was intended to be a Valentine’s Day inspiration to those who were celebrating the holiday alone. She captioned the clip “Happy Valentine’s Day. Do the #ManifestLoveChallenge with me babies!!!! Ladies make that list of your perfect man… Then make a list of the type of woman he would need by his side. Focus on becoming her.”
In the video she doubled down on this idea, calling out women for expecting more from their suitors than they expect from themselves. “We got all these things we want in a man,” she begins. “He gotta be tall, he gotta be dark, he gotta be handsome, he gotta have pretty teeth, he gotta be a family man, he gotta be financially stable, he gotta be rich, he gotta be successful. He gotta be all these things and we ain’t even have the things on that list. He gotta be a family man. B*tch, you ain’t talked to yo mama in six months but you want him to be a family man.”
While the video has its share of supporters, namely Tyrese who reposted it, many women were offended by Simones comments. One tweeted “What B Simone said is just basic common sense but black women don’t need to be reminded every five seconds that we have to bring something to the table. Actually, we bring wayyyy more to the table than anybody else. Statistically.”
What B Simone said is just basic common sense but black women don’t need to be reminded every five seconds that we have to bring something to the table. Actually, we bring wayyyy more to the table than anybody else. Statistically.
— Mya (@_Braylynn) February 16, 2021
Fantasia shared a similar sentiment. In a video sit down with her husband, the “When I See U” singer said she felt bad for friends with “lists”, and even fears that some of them may never find love. “I be wanting to say so bad, well girl you will never be in a relationship, because we are all flawed people.” She went on to say of her husband “I see a king, most people miss it because they’re busy putting together lists. In you I saw the greatness.”
"In you I saw the greatness" ❤️ pic.twitter.com/M0PdacV3zu
— Fantasia Taylor (@TasiasWord) February 18, 2021
Twitter was divided on Fantasia’s message with some users even comparing it to B. Simone’s earlier this week. “So much emotional labour, when u could just be free” responded one person. It seems the topic still has people divided. See responses below:
But when b Simone said it y’all told her to shut up lmao the irony
— the super sayan (@kashkid_k) February 19, 2021
Women like Fantasia and B. Simone, want a starter kit man. And cool. Whatever works for them. But once yall done building, don’t be surprise if hes perfect for the next woman.
— Sweet Soul Caroline (@Myrtle_Urkel) February 19, 2021
They gonna give her the same heat they gave #bsimone tho?
— OptimusPrime62 (@Optimus_Prime62) February 19, 2021